Title: The Dead Inside: A True Story
Author: Cyndy Etlet
Page count: 288 pages
Format availability: Kindle eBook
Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire
Release date: April 4 2017
Series / anthology / stand alone: Stand alone
Got my copy via Netgalley for an exchange of honest review! Thank you Chronicle Books!
I never was a badass. Or a slut, a junkie, a stoner, like they told me I was. I was just a kid looking for something good, something that felt like love. I was a wannabe in a Levi’s jean jacket. Anybody could see that. Except my mother. And the professionals at Straight.
From the outside, Straight Inc. was a drug rehab. But on the inside it was…well, it was something else.
All Cyndy wanted was to be loved and accepted. By age fourteen, she had escaped from her violent home, only to be reported as a runaway and sent to a “drug rehabilitation” facility that changed her world.
To the public, Straight Inc. was a place of recovery. But behind closed doors, the program used bizarre and intimidating methods to “treat” its patients. In her raw and fearless memoir, Cyndy Etler recounts her sixteen months in the living nightmare that Straight Inc. considered “healing.”
I didn’t finish the book, I really wanted to but it is pretty disturbing for me. I just don’t want to see the hardships she’s been thru because I end up crying… So I spoiled myself and read the ending which is so good! So this maybe different review. I feel the grip, the heartbreaking and as I imagine what happened to the author itself is really shocking.
Cyndy didn’t have a good childhood past. Instead, it’s heart breaking and really bad past. She tries to be fit in the society where every kid is cool: she wears pants that is fit to the society, smoked pot with her “friends” and pretending to sleep while she’s being raped multiple times. She runs away and sleeping to her friends’ house just to escape to her mother and to her step-father until she got in the Straight Inc where her ruined life continuous.
I love the book itself, it’s just I can’t really finish it. I don’t want to see and visualize everything what she’s been thru because it totally affects me really hard. What I like about this book is that how she deliver her past to everyone. I like it how she trusts her readers about it, her courage to write this and it’s like she’s a friend that saying “hey I need you to know me okay? Read this book” kind of thing. The ending, gosh the ending is great. She didn’t gave up living and didn’t drag her down. She didn’t want to end her life with a miserable past, she’s a strong woman, and she knows that she can escape all of this.
Overall, I actually liked it. I didn’t finish the book but I spoiled myself until the end and it is really good book to read in one sitting. Even though I didn’t experience the way she experienced from the past, it’s like I get her. Like I would love to know her more. This is worthy to read.
About the Author
A modern-day Cinderella, Cyndy Etler was homeless at fourteen, summa cum laude at thirty. Currently a young adult author and teen life coach, Etler spent sixteen years teaching troubled teens in schools across America.
Before she was paid for teaching Etler did it for free, volunteering at public schools and facilities for runaway teens. Today she speaks at fundraisers, schools and libraries, convincing teens that books work better than drugs.
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